Knowing your value can banish guilt you might have over fees for your services

Asheville Citizen Times
Printed 5/14/07

"I can't afford to hire you as my coach."   "I would come to your events if they were less expensive." These are hard words to hear because I know the value of what I offer and want to make myself available to everyone.  Plus, because I am the service, it is hard not to take such comments personally. 

I've spent a great deal of energy in establishing my fees.  I have based them on: my required/desired income, the cost of acquiring my expertise and skills, my assessment of the value of what I offer to my clients, and what I believe the market will bear.  Somewhere in this mix is my desire to help as many people as possible regardless of what they can pay. 

It's the later part that makes me uncomfortable.  These contrary perspectives often make me feel judged as greedy or I become critical of someone who does not value my work. 

However, it would be impossible (and perhaps even unhealthy) for me to try to be accessible and affordable to all people that could benefit from my work.  I have learned that my best work emerges when I am coaching or speaking to people who not only need my services but value the benefit I offer AND willingly pay me for them. 

Here are a few things that I have learned while reconciling the tension between my desire to help others and my need to make a living. 
1.    There are people who highly value what I offer and are willing to pay for it.
2.    There are people who will never want what I have to offer.
3.    There are people who want my services but who choose to spend their resources elsewhere.  They want it but don't value it enough to pay my fee.

My job is to build my business and set my fees for those people who value what I offer the most.  I then am free to make the greatest impact in situations where I am serving people who truly value my services the same as I do.  This is not to say that people who don't hire me don't value my kind of work.  I simply must put my efforts and energies out to those who do.

For example, the person who eats primarily to fill their stomach makes a great customer for the diner's short order cook because they value food for similar reasons.  Likewise, the person who cherishes gourmet food, delights in the flavor of spices and variety of textures makes an ideal customer for the chef a 5-star restaurant. 

I may always be a bit uncomfortable whenever someone questions my fees.  However, the more I recognize that value is subjective the more comfortable I will become.  So, the lesson here is that our energy is best used in keeping our services and programs at the highest quality possible thus being the most beneficial to the people who values and pays for our services.